Examining the Pull of Group Masturbation Parties
Of the various group masturbation parties 30-year-old nudist Kyle Rudd has attended over the years, the biggest one drew a dozen-odd men, predominantly over 50. He was the third to arrive that night, and when he walked inside, the host and another guy were already naked. As the remainder of the guests sauntered in, conversation centered on things like work, how the week had been, and the bodies and penises on display. Rudd did most of his masturbating—a blend of group and solo—from the vantage point of the organizer’s couch and managed to ejaculate on himself three or four times in six hours. In the breaks between these bouts of industry, Rudd, a Melbourne-based arts-sector employee, spent his time socializing, drinking beer, and eating pizza.
While some men might prefer to spend their weekends watching the game or relaxing with the family, Rudd says he had a great time.
“I find genitals to be very erotic—ten out of ten,” he says. “For me, I think being exposed and on display is very erotic. It’s knowing that others are admiring your genitals as they mutually get off on it.”
For anybody entertaining the idea of attending a group masturbation party, the grassroots DIY scene is a fertile field of opportunity, according to Rudd.
"He is normally a very lovely lad and very bright. But unfortunately, he had started dabbling in drugs."
—Rolling Stone looks at “meow meow,” the drug that made a teen cut off his penis.
An Irish Man Got a 7 Week Erection from Riding a Bike
A 22-year-old competitive bicyclist in Ireland suffered from an erection that lasted seven weeks due to a straddling accident with the bike’s crossbar. Men right now might be thinking, “so what’s the problem?” Well, the problem is that if this were left untreated it could have lead to a serious blood clot, which could then lead to a stroke. At this moment, I’m reminded of the time I thought I had a blood clot, but it ended up just being a ketchup stain on my breast.
The cyclist (who shockingly does not want to reveal his name) had, as the Irish Independentreports, “what is known as a ‘high-flow priapism’ with a rigid erection, which happens without sexual stimulation.” So it wasn’t even a fun boner. He endured this terrifying nonstop erection for five weeks before seeing a doctor about it. I can understand waiting a day because, sure, it’s kind of funny, but five whole weeks? The only explanation I can think of is perhaps he was terrified of his doctor saying, “Oh shite lad, looks like we got to cut your dick off. Chug this Guinness while I go get the big scissors.”
Your ADHD Meds Might Give You a Life-Threatening Erection
The FDA issued a warning today that a small number of the 5 percent of young boys who have been diagnosed with ADHD are at risk for priapism, aka: boners that won’t go away. Medications that contain methylphenidate can trap blood in the penises of men, and even more distressingly, young boys, who already suffer from the “terrible affliction" of hyperbonerism, which is funny, except when it’s not.
Priapism, named after Priapus, the Greek fertility god pictured above, is most often caused by scarier and more painful conditions like––prepare to wince––kidney stones, hernias, or twisting of the spermatic cord, which can overshadow the severity of a persistent erection. Priapism on it’s own, however, has to be treated or it can cause fertility problems, and, in the worst of cases,gangrene of the penis, which necessitates amputation.
What was your first reaction when you heard the name “Dick Wolf?”
A dangerous person. Wolves and dicks are dangerous. The man matches up to his name. When you meet him, he’s a big guy. He looks like he’d sit at the head of a table at a mob meeting or something. He’s very serious. Thank god for Dick Wolf. His checks clear, I don’t have nothin’ to say bad about that guy. In this business, if you have one powerful executive that likes you, he can basically help your life. Dick Wolf has bought me a lot of cars, paid for a lot of vacations… I ain’t mad at the dude.
—Ice T Really Likes Talking About Law & Order – Full Interview
The Art of Taboo – Ren Hang
Being a radical artist in China is a pretty tricky prospect. Considering censors banned paradigm of inoffensive banality Katy Perry from the country’s airwaves for supposedly being too vulgar (and not forgetting that time authorities made Ai Weiwei disappear for posting seminude photos of himself online), you would have thought that Chinese photographer Ren Hang would lay off filling his portfolio with gaping buttholes and models pissing on each other, or sustaining his unparalleled level of dedication to photographing erect penises.
But he hasn’t, which is a good thing, because his photos are great—somehow managing to desexualize naked bodies and turn them into sometimes funny, sometimes beautiful, sometimes gnarled, hairy, human-shaped sculptures that make you want to get naked with all your friends, paint your dick red, and hang out on a roof in Beijing. Which is basically the end game all photographers are going for, right? I wanted to talk to Ren about his work, so I did. Here’s that conversation.
VICE: First off, why is everyone naked in basically every single one of your photos?
Ren Hang: Well, people come into this world naked and I consider naked bodies to be people’s original, authentic look. So I feel the real existence of people through their naked bodies.
Is that why the bodies aren’t presented in a kind of conventionally “sexy” way, even if the photos are sexual?
No, I don’t take photos with any particular purpose or plan—I just grasp whatever comes into my mind, arrange that in front of me and take a photo of it. I don’t pay too much attention to whether a scene is sexy or not when I’m taking photos.
Yeah, a lot of the bodies end up looking more like kind of grotesque sculptures.
That’s not really intentional, although I do consider bodies as sculptural—or, as you say, grotesque sculptures—so I suppose the sculptures exist because the bodies exist.
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