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Tune in Friday, April 5th at 11PM
We’ve been sticking abominable substances inside the Gross Jar for roughly the duration of a school summer holiday now (six weeks). Along the way, the following have entered the glassy receptacle of desperate foulness:
- Piss
- Human shit
- Vomit
- Phlegm
- Rotten vegetables
- Drain hair
- Santorum
- Mouldy doner kebab
- Fish heads
- Lamb intestines
- A chicken’s foot
- Durian (Asian “stink fruit”)
- Human teeth
- An apple
- A Biro (scientific control)
After a month and a half of festering, the smell produced by the jar’s sinful contents is now worse than hell. There’s no point lying, this is starting to become tiresome. Those of us who deal with the Gross Jar have developed a claustrophobic relationship with the jar similar to that of Michael Corleone and his petrified wife, Kay, in The Godfather II. The jar is the Don and we are all his battered wives.
Our noses are sore, our hands dry from being washed so many times and our self-esteem below zero. But, like dying soldiers who’ve become numb to pain, on we march. This is week six. This is a dead rat.
