Meet the Man Behind London’s Biggest ‘Elite’ Sex Parties
Chris Reynolds Gordon is kind of like Britain’s answer to Dan Bilzerian. Only, where the latter made his name playing poker, throwing naked women off roofs, and rapidly becoming Instagram’s most-followed misogynist, Chris has managed to get where he’s at without any of the awkward social media machismo of his American counterpart.
He’s been a millionaire; he’s gone broke. He’s owned property around the world; he’s been homeless. He was a junior national 800 meters champion; he’s met with Vladimir Putin about trading rough diamonds. Now, before hitting his 30th birthday, he’s turned his and his friend Eva’s “Heaven SX” concept into one of London’s most popular “elite” sex parties.
In light of the Killing Kittens group—probably the UK’s largest sex party brand—recently inviting Heaven SX into its fold, I thought I’d catch up with Chris to find out his thoughts on how he makes his money.
VICE: Hey, Chris. So, first off, run me through what happens at a Heaven SX party.
Chris Reynolds Gordon: It’s like going to any normal bar or club—you have people dressed up looking nice, chatting, laughing, getting to know each other. Then, a little bit later on—at about 12:00 or 1:00 AM, when the mood’s right—the girls will go and get changed into lingerie. It’s a bit of an awkward moment, with all the guys chatting and sitting with each other, then all these girls come in looking super hot and the atmosphere changes and people start disappearing.
Why do you call it “elite”?
I went to quite a lot of parties in the past, and everyone was calling them elite. But then you’d see, like, 50- or 60-year-old people who weren’t that attractive. Not that there aren’t attractive people in their 50s and 60s, but these weren’t people you’d stereotypically think of as attractive. It’s really quite a shallow thing, though, because what is good looking? Basically, the hottest [people] we wanted to play with just got together—everyone who was a 10 on the hot chart. The average age is also quite young. There’s nothing else like it.
How to Throw a Holiday Party
Watch chef/artist Julia Ziegler-Haynes teach you how to throw a holiday party on the fly. Get your friends wasted and well-fed on a strict budget and they’ll never realize that you’re a complete cheapskate!
I Thought a Birthday Party in a Sex Shop Would Be More Fun
Last week I was asked to cover Glory Hole 2013, the 42nd birthday party for Hollywood’s famous sex shop, The Pleasure Chest.
Like most people, I like sex and I like parties. This sounded great.
My photographer Nate and I were greeted with this sign, letting us know that “Sex Is Back”! I’m not sure where it went, certainly not my apartment, but it’s back.
We walked to the bar for a drink as I listened to guests make boring small talk that sounded like the pedestrian dialogue in Grand Theft Auto 5.
There was very little talk about sex or the store or anything related to the event or any substance at all. Instead people talked about what people in Los Angeles usually talk about: Themselves. Their careers. Their agents. Their significant others. The weather. It felt pretty much like any shallow Hollywood tradeshow/party, complete with gourmet food trucks and twinkle lights but with the added element of a sex store.
Celebrating Eid with Shisha & Sports Cars in Manchester
There are various ways to celebrate Eid al-Fitr, the Muslim festival that marks the end of the holy month of Ramadan. The most common procedure for celebration involves gathering your family early in the morning to perform the Eid prayer, before breaking your Ramadan fast by eating tables full of food. However, the annual procedure down the Curry Mile (or half-mile, if you’re being pedantic) in Rusholme, Greater Manchester is a little different to what you’ll find elsewhere.
Muslims flock to the area from miles around to celebrate Eid here. I arrived in Rusholme at around 7:30 PM on Friday and already the atmosphere was electric. All of the mile’s curry houses, shisha bars, and milkshake cafes were packed. Street vendors and performers peppered the pavements and men either roared around on quad bikes or crawled by in super cars, blaring the kind of dubstep that sounds like the guttural groans of several thousand dying fax machines.
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DOs & DON’Ts Book Two Release and the End of the DOs & DON’Ts
Last night we threw a party to commemorate the end of the Dos & Dont’s column in VICE.
The Fat Jew and Cat Marnell wrote pithy judgemental notes on decals and attached them to our fans who were visibly shocked and astonished when guest speaker Genesis P-Orridge announced that the release of the Dos & Don’ts Book Two, out now on VICE Books was the final chapter of one of the most glorious, celebrated fashion critique columns in the history of publishing.
As Genesis broke the news, the atmosphere at the party turned from “Yeaaahhhhhhh!” to “Nooooooo!!!!”
Dos & Don’ts Book 2 editor Thomas Morton / party organizer was the man responsible for killing the column / breaking everybody’s hearts. Suroosh was like: “Wait, we still run the Dos & Don’ts?”
Editor-in-Chief Rocco Castoro (right) was like: “Fucking psyched this column is gone, it’s like one less email I have to worry about.” Jason Mojica (middle), who’s the head of going to dangerous places video content was like: “TBH I only used to look at the mag for the American Apparel ads.”
Fat Jew. Has to move back to his parents house as his only source of income has been cut off.
Jonathan Toubin was like: “WTF, I came back from the dead for this shit?” Susanne likes weird, awk things so she was really happy about it all and Gazin is like the same vibe, ie goth.
This is when Genesis announced that the DDs were over and Annette was like: “Wait? What?” Then her face totally changed and she was like “WTF X a million???”
Here’s Cat Marnell. Email donations to email@example.com
And everybody else is in the gallery above. Most of those photos were shot before the announcement was made, that’s why they’re still looking happy. Seriously it turned into a fucking bloodbath. Sorry everyone.
By Andy Capper (ex Dos & Don’ts writer)
Photos by Vito Fun
See the rest of the gallery
Hey New York, the new DOs & DON’Ts book comes out next Wednesday. Come to its bday party!
It’s the little things (exploding invitations, cages filled with dildos, Damien Hirst paintings, etc.) that make the nightlife experience great.
Watch Discotecture - Episode 4
Discotecture - Episode 2
In Episode 2, our designers and experts postulate the future of nightlife design by looking at past stalwart institutions such as Limelight, Studio 54, Mudd Club, Area, and Palladium. Stay tuned for Episode 3, which airs on April 23.
Watch it here
We’re Throwing a Party in Pakistan
It’s no secret that we’re super big in Pakistan. When we step off the plane at Benazir Bhutto International we’re greeted with a sea of paparazzi snapping photos and shoving mics in our faces hoping to get the big scoop on VICE for the 11:00 news. Our popularity is probably due to the time we’ve spent hanging out in their gun markets. Or maybe it was our coverage of the Taliban in Pakistan. Or, for the fashion-forward Pakistani, it was most likely the trip we took to Islamabad’s first fashion week that reserved us a special place in their hearts. Whatever the reason, we figured with public interest as strong as it is in the country, throwing a party there is a no-brainer. It’s a wonder we didn’t do it sooner. So tonight in Karachi, we’re having a free show at the M.A.D. school (music, art, and dance) featuring //orangenoise, the Chand Tara Orchestra, and Basim of the Kominas. The party is from 9 to 11 PM and, as with all of our stateside events, it’s free. See you there.