Can You Spot the German Army Snipers in These Photos?
If you’ve ever played Call of DutyOnline, you’ll know that snipers are very sneaky bastards. But that’s the point. They hide in the distance, camouflaged in their surroundings, and pick you off before you’ve even realised they’re there. In real life, these highly trained marksmen are capable of surviving alone in the wilderness for weeks on end. They diglittle holes—or “nests,” as they call them—and hang out there for a bit before popping up and putting a bullet through someone’s skull from more than a mile away.
Artist Simon Menner was recently granted permission to spend some time with the German Army and its snipers. During the two occasions he visited, he captured the soldiers’ remarkable ability to blend into their environment, producing images that appear to be simple landscape shots until you look close enough to spot the barrel of a gun.
This is a common theme in Menner’s work, which often focuses on information and the ways in which it can be restricted and revealed. Other similar works include minefields in Bosnia, and the more recent book Top Secret(Hatje Cantz, 2013), an extraordinary collection of both ridiculous and shocking images from the Stasi archives.
In episode three of VICE, Thomas Morton meets a gun-crazy pastor who teaches his young students gun drills and tactics to disarm attackers, and Shane Smith travels to Fallujah, Iraq, where a rise in birth defects has been linked to the American military’s suspected use of depleted-uranium munitions during the war.
Last Monday, a jury found two former Fullerton, California, police officers not guiltyon one charge of excessive force, two of manslaughter, and one of second-degree murder in the beating death of Kelly Thomas. The 2011 altercation, which lead to Thomas’s death five days later, was captured in detail by surveillance cameras and audio from police recorders—on tape, the cops can be seen beating the homeless man mercilessly and Tasing him twice in the face. At one point, Thomas is moaning “Help me dad” as the officers swing their nightsticks at him.
That fairly clear video evidence, along with the activism of Kelly’s father Ron (a former sheriff’s deputy) and the mobilization outraged community, ensured Thomas’s death got a lot more media coverage than the killing of homeless people by police normally do. But the officers are still walking free after beating an unarmed man to death. (In fact, one of them, Jay Cicinelli, already wants his job back.) How does that happen? A great many people in the community are asking that same question—multiple protests against the outcome of the trial this week resulted in 14 arrests
One answer to that question is that the jurors, like most Americans, probably thought that cops are generally almost always right. A Gallup Poll from last month found that 54 percent of respondents had “high” or “very high” amounts of trust in police officers. People think more favorably of cops than they do journalists, politicians, lawyers, or even members of the clergy. The only authority figures more trusted than the police are doctors, nurses, pharmacists, and grade school teachers.
“According to the Albuquerque Journal, McCarthy reportedly stormed out during a fight over extraterrestrial life with her unnamed boyfriend and then returned with a plan for vengeance. The police report describes how she went to her bedroom, dressed up in lingerie, put the gun in a place no guns should go, then somehow performed an unspecified sex act with the gun insider her. Naturally, that was just a prelude to pulling the gun out, pointing it at her boyfriend, and asking the presumably rhetorical question “Who is crazy, you or me?”
Anonymous boyfriend took the gun away and dropped it in the toilet. McCarthy then took it back, so he just threw it in the trash.”
There are a lot of questions left unanswered by this story, which is a real thing that happened in New Mexico and has been picked up by many well-respected media outlets. Question 1: Whatkind of argument about aliens was it? Were they debating whether aliens exist, whether they had visited Earth, or was it a more abstract discussion about the Drake Equation? Question 2: The sex act has got to be a blowjob, right? Or was she, like, using the gun on herself? Question 3: Are the two of them still a coupe? Question 4: Was it all the way up in there, or did she just sort of rest the barrel inside herself?
Most importantly, what the heck kind of gun did she have that she could fit into her womanhood? Putting aside juvenile jokes about Ms. McCarthy’s unmentionables being especially loose or wide or whatever, vaginas just aren’t very big. What sort of firearm could she have been packing, and if you’re a lady who has decided that vaginal conceal-carry is right for you, what’s the best gun to purchase? Here are a few options:
North American Arms Mini Revolver 22 LR 1 1/8”
Say hello to my little friend! Ha ha, that was just some “pulling a gun out of my vagina” humor there, sorry. Seriously, this weapon is marketed as “the most famous tiny pistol in the world,” and with that laminated rosewood finish on the grip, it’s easy to see why. More importantly, it’s just under two and a half inches high and four inches long, meaning that you don’t have to be Galactus, Devourer of Worlds down there to fit it in.
Sig P238 380 ACP, Pearl Grips, Black Multi-Tone Finish
We found this beauty of a gem online for $729.99, so it’s no bargain, but for a respectable woman of means, there’s no reason the gun that she pulls out of her vagina to settle an argument about aliens or end a tedious dinner party conversations shouldn’t be every bit as classy as the rest of her outfit. The polished, engraved slide and the pearl white grips will be appreciated by whoever is unlucky enough to get a look at this piece, and though it might be a bit tricky to get the 3.9-inch height in, every good woman knows that some things are worth the effort.
A School in Ontario Staged a Fake Massacre for a Police Training Exercise
Journalism students at Sheridan College, near Toronto, were ordered to take down video and photos (which you can see in the gallery above) of a mock school shooting that have ruffled some feathers with the school’s faculty and administration.
On November 25, the college hosted a training exercise for the Halton Regional Police Department. Students from the school’s musical theatre program acted as if they had been shot dead, complete with fake wounds and blood.
The scenario took place with two shooters played by plainclothes cops. About 100 students and staff participated in the event, with 15 playing dead and a further 10 playing wounded.